I found this list hanging on the wall at a friend's cube at work, and thought it was too funny to pass up.
Top 11 Worst Resumes
- Lead programmer of the SQL Slammer worm
- As data analyst for the Dept. of Veterans Affairs, I often took work home
- Spearheaded the 2005 deployment of my company's Token Ring network
- Saved thousands of dollars in electricity by turning off the AC in the server room every night
- Certified in OS/2 Server support and Apple Newton repair
- Initiated personal project to find holes in corporate Web porn filter
- Designed a document management system when working for Arthur Andersen on Enron audit
- Successfully transferred $3.2 million in corporate funds to wife of former Nigerian oil minister
- Improved MP3 download speeds by switching from Kazaa to BitTorrent
- Set company record for most HIPAA compliance violations
- Assisted NSA agents with installation of network taps at AT&T
Originally from: http://www.networkcomputing.com/showitem.jhtml?articleID=189602342
If you click through to the link above, the next article about calling Mom is funny.
About Steve
Steve Andrews has been working as a developer for more than 8 years. During this time, he has designed and developed applications in such widely varying areas as trust accounting, medical information management, supply chain management, and retail systems.
He has firsthand developer experience with a variety of languages, including Java, VB, and .NET. Most recently, he has been immersed in SharePoint.
He is currently employed at RDA Corporation in Philadelphia, PA, as a Software Engineer and a team member in the Architectural Guidance evangelism team.
Steve is also an MTCS (x2), ICSOO, and .NET fanatic.